A Funny Thing Happened On The Way to The Birthday Party

So, it’s the first big snowfall of 2021/2022’s winter season, and I awake to weather warnings telling me “hey, you’re gonna have a hard time getting to your shows.” They weren’t worded like that, as very few Weather Network subscribers are magicians. Nonetheless, I was worried. All good though. I was making exceptional time.

First show, early. Second show. Early. Third show…. I was running ahead of schedule, traffic looked good, and all I had to do was decide if I should find a drive thru, to refuel my magic powers. Then suddenly I hear that grinding sound you don’t want to hear while driving. Not that I can think of a grinding sound you do want to hear.

Anyway, I pulled over. Looked behind. All good. Walked around the car. All good. Looked under the car. All good. Hmm… okay. Let’s get back in the… wait. Wait, wait, wait. Is the front tire supposed to be that shape? (I won’t describe the shape. Just assume, ‘no’.)

Getting someone to come and help with a tire change during the season’s first snowstorm is like trying to get anyone to do anything during a snowstorm. Expect delays. Unless it’s a WonderPhil Magic Show. Those are always on time. Unless, there’s a flat tire, in which case… oh dear.

I’ve been late for 3 shows in my whole career, and one of those I wasn’t actually late for. The client just totally micscomunnicated their desires and misread (didn’t read!?!!?) my confirmation email, and… and this is a digression. Back to the tire. I’m sure you’re on the edge of your seat.

Needless to say, I let the client know there may be a problem. I messaged all the magician I trusted to see who could cover for me, and, I realized, it was time to do something I’d never done before. Change my own tire.

So, my bright purple car, with the orange tie on the hood, is pulled over in Thornhill, with an entire magic show unloaded behind it so I could access the spare. I start cranking on the jack, hoping it was in the right spot (nothing broke, which means, yes??) And off came the flat.

Wait. Let me pull a little harder on the lug wrench. I think it’s called a lug wrench. I know playing cards, magic wand, Svengali, silver sceptre, silk, TT, Senata…. I know dozens of tools, for magic. But, lug wrench? Sure. I pulled. I pushed. Jeepers that’s hard! But, got them off. Got the spare on all by myself…. Almost. At this point a friend spotted me. How he recognized it was me, while driving by, I’ll never know. Anyway, he came, he helped, the car was drivable. And I made it to the show! Late. But. I made it. The kids were wonderful. My client was understanding.

It was very reminiscent of the last time I was late for a show… about, 8 years ago when I got a flat tire. Only this time, I fixed the problem (mostly) by myself. LIfe skills: level up.